My whole life I’ve been blessed with a path of loving and letting go. Though, I know it’s a blessing, my heart still aches through it all. And I love that.
I remember my Dad leaving the house when I was 3 1/2. It was my first memory.
The times I tried to hold on, it was much to my despair, that I would turn into a childish version of myself. Maybe it’s my inner 3 year old crying, asking for Dad to come home. Begging to be forgiven for my mistakes that led to the departure.
How I feel now, is that the more we let go, the more we can bring in love, access more love, and be more love.
I want to hold onto the wonderful things Men say to me. As if they could feel the same way in every moment. But I would rather let them go, let them go all the way, like a helium balloon in the sky. Let it reach further and further. In that space I can be more of me. They can be more of them. Even if my heart has a lot of big feelings. It’s the next evolvement, and no matter how uncertain it seems, I know it gets better. I’ll look in the eyes of someone I love again, and really appreciate who they are and give them all the care and love I want for them.