I’m on a turmeric farm in Hilo. It’s almost a year since my first of four visits to the island. Hawaii feels like a lucid dream. When I’m here I’m so present, aware, relaxed, and open. The air feels especially light and my breath is at ease.
Except that moment I’m waiting for important news about our produce delivery, due to a broken down truck, and my heart starts racing. I start thinking about how I’m stuck on an island and can’t be helpful.
And then, I put the phone down, and walk straight across the grass 20 feet away, past the tiny purple flowers, and down to the waterfall.
I come back to the phone, only after I’ve let go and immersed myself in the safety of the river. The sounds of the mini waterfall, and the lusciousness that surrounds me.
My computer is plugged into the wall, like old times, because it’s an EMF free zone. Maybe it’s one of the ingredients that helps me breathe better here and relax through every intense business moment.
There’s something missing for me though, no matter how much I fully appreciate this. No matter how much I feel supported, safe, and truly healthy in this environment. Not to mention finally able to tan my skin without burning it.
I am so acclimated to our SoCal produce from the best growers. My cells, my breath, my whole body, feels different without those greens. There’s appreciation for them, and then there’s the moment of realization that it’s my life giving energy source. Surely, there’s a solution for this.
Locavore is a cute little store in town, just 20 minutes from the farm, and they have some lovely little bags of kale and bok choy. Abundant life is a block down, and that’s where I pick up fresh hearts of palm for the first time.
Palm to heart, I carry my little ingredients back to the waterfall cabin, then decide to bring everything to the commercial kitchen. I forage some Hawaii spinach on the farm.
The Hawaii spinach isn’t very flavorful, but it has a very interesting element, which is that it resembles okra. The sliminess in the leaf, is not too much but it’s just enough to give the soup a little bit of thickness. Instead of paying for a bag of arrowroot powder, to which I’ll never finish, I got to forage just a few leaves. And since the flavor isn’t amazing, but it’s not bad, pretty neutral, I just used a little bit.
As incredible as these big beautiful leaves are, I still miss my California greens.
The next day, my Garden Gnome magically arrives from California with Spigarello and carrots! We snack on veggies while we watch the sun set on the beach. Aside from the unfortunate cruise ship in the way, the scene was gorgeous! The flavor of the carrots are genuinely, my little essence of heart warming happiness, and he knows it. The next morning, we have breakfast with left over soup, hibiscus kombucha, and some California treats.
The night before, I had danced next to a unicorn, and played with a light up Hoola hoop. Things were looking up. They were already up, but once I have my greens in me, I feel my cells doing their own unicorn hoop dance.
I feel the grass, the turmeric in my blood, the flowers, the spider webs, the chicken that knocks at my door, the gecko hiding in funny places, the waterfall, the smiles, the weight of the world, the lightness, the sun, my breath.
And I helped harvest Kali Haldi Turmeric, or black turmeric. It’s a highly medicinal, rare find, that is actually florescent blue. As vibrant as can be.
In the end of it all with lots of love and rainbows. I shared a shiitake and purple potato soup with red turmeric and kaffir lime, for all of us.
Misty gently cupped her hands around the dragon fly in my car, who traveled with us from Ojai to Topanga.
“Look we have a friend.” She said.
“The dragonfly wanted a ride to Topanga, it’s out to experience a whole new world.” I said.
She let it go, as she gently opened her hands out the window. A Dragon Fly is symbolic of breaking through illusions and bringing visions of power. We talked about our visions on the way to Ojai. Whether or not we would both move to Hawaii, and other fun ideas.
We had traveled to Ojai to see a beautiful, outdoor dance show, and we made reservations for “The Ranch House”.
To make a reservation, you need to answer a few questions. “Are you coming for business or pleasure?” and “What are your company names?” They most certainly liked our company names.
When we arrived, it resembled the “Inn of the Seventh Ray” in Topanga. It has a little bit of that vibe, and upon stepping in, I felt “The Ranch House” was just as sweet, with more focus on local organic, ingredients. They have a rose garden, a piano, and an all around comforting setting. Every flavor in the dinner was delicious, but I’ll tell you about the soup.
I have strong feelings about soup. This is one of the loveliest restaurants I’ve been to. I have mostly felt that the attention to soups in restaurants are lacking. Though, I can appreciate simplicity, especially when using fresh ingredients from farmers I know, it’s funny to me that there isn’t as much attention to soups as there are desserts. I don’t see that as a criticism. More as an overall, universal truth. It has more to do with the demand of customers and what business are catering to. Much like in super markets, where we’re seeing a tiny portion of what the earth has available to us.
I notice that, many nice restaurants have a baker. They dedicate their time to making the breads, pastries, and treats, to look and taste remarkable. Sugary treats, excite people, and it’s an incredible art. I’m more excited about dressing up a soup. It’s the healthiest thing I can imagine eating. It doesn’t seem to excite people as much as a sugary chocolate flourless cake drizzled with fresh berry sauce, but it’s so worthy of our attention. There are billions of ways to make a soup exciting, and I’ve only made about 800 of them.
If every restaurant had a Soup Sorceress, like they had a baker, the world would be really fun and healthy.
This sugar snap pea soup, tasted fresh, and nice. And with a few little magic touches on top, a crunchy pickled, sugar snap pea, with a dash of freshly cracked pink pepper, or other little crunchy bits of veggies with fresh herbs and spices……It would have been a real experience! Much like the salad was a delightful experience, bursting with various flavors.
If there’s anyone that knows how much work it takes to even just create the base of a soup with only fresh ingredients, much less creating a whole beautiful world on top of the base, it’s me! I’m merely stating my wishes and dreams in the new world, and what I aim to bless it with.
Though I can understand, why more attention is placed on the crunchy salad with fresh dressing, or the plate of salmon with duck egg sauce and farro. I still imagine the days when soups get as much attention as desserts. The Soup Sorceress in the background, with focus, imagination, and magic, creating something that lights up our hearts.
I was asked to write an article for Heart and Soil Magazine. I had a week to complete it, and it just so happened I was packing my bag to head up to Petaluma, where I thought I would have a leisurely little NorCal trip. To my delight, I walked into a beautiful farm style kitchen to concoct a new soup to share for the article. By my last night there, I fell backwards on the couch, exhausted, determined, and happy. I finished the article by the late evening, with not a moment to spare.
I had stumbled upon sunchokes and nettles at County Line Harvest Farm, visited a cute kitchen store for a new spoon, and fell to the graces of every little ingredient by way of instinct.
Heart and Soil magazine is an excellent resource to keep up to date on information about soil and food. Check out their magazine, and you’ll see my story in their gardeners edition!
The reason I feel so vibrant and abundant has a lot to do with the produce I enjoy. When we talk about how we need to feel abundance to have abundance, that can be a challenge for some if they’re in a tough position. And I believe that fresh local veggies can help relieve that feeling.
When I look at a lettuce from a small farm, it has an effect on my body. This lettuce isn’t a $400 abundance course — though you can do that too — it’s just a $3 lettuce. That’s it. Keeping these kinds of fresh vibrant veggies around you can do wonders for your vibration. Which is why we donate produce through my CSA, Earth Matterz.
I’m speaking specifically to the lettuce that’s grown from small farms that I know. The quality is far beyond the normal grocery store organic produce.
10 years ago, I didn’t know my farmers. When I got to know them, everything changed! Once I started to eat this way, my vibrancy for life became amplified. If I go a few days without some type of greens from one of our farms, I can feel it in my cells, that something is missing.
I’ve had the most vibrance and abundance in my life through a real connection with food.
I don’t buy produce at grocery stores or Amazon — even if they’re labeled organic. There’s a better vibration out there! Though there are some smaller grocery stores that do buy from small farms, it’s still a tight community full of people who feel connected to the spirit of the earth.
Eating in season is a lifestyle.
Miracles happen everyday, small ones and big ones. When we connect to our food through the seasons, we are in connection with the natural vibration and magic of the earth. Therefore those magical moments happen more often. And it’s as simple as enjoying a vegetable from the garden or an organic small farm.
You can connect to a small farm, or CSA subscription service in your area, and watch the magic unfold in your life.
I know it did for mine.
What I’ve really seen change people’s lives is when they try a new vegetable that they haven’t tried before. At first, it seems uncomfortable, but then they acclimate to it. They find a way to enjoy it until it’s normal to them. At this point, they have more variety in their life, which is a cornerstone for how we treat life in general.
When you try a bright pink watermelon radish for the first time, or pink celery! Maybe some kohlrabi, or speckled romaine lettuce. You’ll certainly know the feeling I’m talking about.
I arrived through the passing of the magic threshold, where I moved through painful memories, amongst dark, twisted branches. That’s how it felt.
I began to awaken from my dream. In the portal from one dimension to the next, I moved through the stories. The stories that still break my heart. That I have spent almost every day crying about this last year. Crying so many tears of devastation in the middle of the night. I told some of the stories with a group of writers, called the Magic Threshold. Some stories I kept to myself. They wondered why I was so silent. There are some things I just can’t share.
The emotions of those memories from years ago had an effect on my body. Middle of last year, I was hitting my fists on the ground, crying because my body was in so much pain. I tried to tell people, it just wasn’t something anyone could understand. They had their own concerns. I found myself in the Doctors office, doing natural IV treatments 3 days a week. I felt so lucky to be there. On one visit, someone sent me a random message, to keep going. I looked up from my phone, to see the words “Star Power”, written on a magazine.
As I moved through this portal, while awakening out of my dream space, it was hard. It was hard like the way it’s hard to scream inside of a dream. You know those dreams? The ones where someone is chasing you, or you are trying to scream to get help, but you can’t because you are in a dream? You just try so hard, so much, and you just can’t.
Then something magical happened in the portal, upon waking.
I got through the stories and spirit showed me a golden gate. I walked through it. “You’ve entered the magic threshold”, it said. Suddenly my body, and spirit were awakened fully. The transmission was clear, that the intention of the magic threshold was complete. Flooded with good feelings, an opening, and great awakening. I got it. It was one story I shared just before this night, that made it clear to me.
We had our closing ceremony the next week. I lit candles. Some Women wore sparkles and flower crowns. I wore my gold ring crown that I graduated to, just days before the ceremony.
“That ring looks like…You’ve arrived.” my friend Kandi said at the Kinship Station.
I had an arrow ring that symbolized pointing me in a new direction. A Phoenix ring symbolizing my constant rebirth. And now the golden crown.
The last words said to me, in the closing ceremony, were to put me through the “opening of the mouth ceremony” like they did in Ancient Egypt. Maybe I will open my mouth and share some more. The same way I open my hands with so much light and energy to make soup. The same way, I felt the opening of the gate, into the magic threshold.
I make soups to help people feel better. To soothe their hearts and souls, and provide them with the absolute healthiest food they can find, from the best farms. We are sensitive creatures, deserving of foods that nurture our heart and souls.
To get my recipe for this creamy beet borscht soup, click here! May it soothe your soul like it did for me the night after the magic threshold ceremony.
I think I’ll be telling some more joyful stories soon.
I remember that only two months into the pandemic, friends here would say, “things are going back to normal soon.” I knew that they weren’t.
Once Upon a Time, there were characters here that I would meet and write about. I met an Earth Angel while I was doing a demo for my broth. He was reading a book on the inside tables. Since then we’ve taken some twists and turns. We visited each other often here, sharing and mentally working out life. Our last day here was a couple weeks ago before he left LA. I sat down next to him and looked straight ahead into the glass windows. I listened to him for a few minutes, he listened to me times 3. He’s on his way to live in a Yurt up North. I talked his ear off, and without a breath, spontaneously turned around and held him tight, my face hiding over his back. Tears burst out of me. I’m happy and sad when the old times dissolve. “I hoped you wouldn’t come so I could just slip away,” he said as tears dripped down his face. I needed him like I needed a hematite stone, and that’s what I handed him when he left that day.
There was a Dragon here. The kind of Dragon spirit who disappears. I had another Dragon spirit before, so I was prepared. We experienced the most blissful 2 hours once sitting by the bushes with popsicles dripping down our hands on a hot summer day. All the chaos of the world just dissipated for that moment, we were so present. The last I saw him he hugged me better than he ever had, like the way my Grandfather hugged my Son the last we ever saw him. The dragon did what no one else had done when he hugged me. He held my hat at the moment I hoped he would so it wouldn’t fall on the street. No one else cared to do that. He was a challenging character who threw my sensitive nature in a spiral, but I really cared about him. It seemed like he didn’t care so much about honoring sacred things, though he saved my pink hat from falling so that was something. My carefully chosen hats are very sacred and he knew that. He never tried to take it and put it on his head. His silly baseball caps wouldn’t have that anyway. Though, he often joked that my hat was my need for protection. I ran away towards the door from the parking lot, and blew him a kiss when he said, “I love you so much”. I walked in the door with a bearded friend who for years has been one of my top supporters for Soup Sorceress. I turned around to see the Dragon drive away in his speedy Tesla. He was waving goodbye to everyone. Symbolic of all the characters in my realm, I knew in that moment, that: That was all folks.
And there were others. Today, I’m facing a lot of sadness. Maybe the loneliest I’ve ever felt. They all disappeared.
Now I’m experiencing a taste of normal. And not the kind of normal people keep hoping will come back. It’s not because I took off my mask and talked to someone. Or invited a friend over by the fire and shared my crazy delicious homemade chocolate cashew cream pudding. Or shared my homemade cashew cream pumpkin ice cream w/ shatavari and reishi, sweetened with maple syrup. Or shared my tomato and herb soup with skullcap.
It’s a taste of normal because all the lively spirits that I gave fun character names too are gone. Erewhon is desolate. They removed the tables. The old characters melted away in different types of ways, like cotton candy people. I’ll never remember the title of that kids book. It had a creepy ending of the family next door who was acting normal and suddenly melted at the front door because they were actually cotton candy people. The story really effected me when I was 8, and now.
As I mourned the melting of old characters, I ignored a few new ones. I just couldn’t bring myself to answer their messages.
I had a favorite dress and now I don’t wear it anymore. I have a new dress, and I’m better than ever.
Here’s to normal things, like spinach, and keeping healthy, because that’s always been my goal no matter what story I’m creating, “A Healthy Earth”.
Inspired by questions in a Rumi poem.
I noticed the empty floor.
I heard the sound of nowhere.
I admired the way synchronicities flowed for me here, and I intuitively knew who I would see.
I was astonished when everyone left.
I wish I could see the child who asked to see me.
My tender heart is drinking years of loneliness.
I thought they were ridiculing my every move.
The most wonderful part was creating a new outfit every time I fell down and re-birthed again and again.
There’s a certain satisfaction that comes with it being the end of a hard day. Especially if we accept it as part of life instead of trying hard to get the law of attraction right and figure out what is wrong with us for hours. Just knowing that we survived that day and its circumstances, and having faith in ourselves going forward is a good moment. Especially with soup and chocolate.
In the middle of the day, I wanted to make the lentil stew I had planned, and finally got it started once my team left for the day to make deliveries. There never seems to be enough time to add the last few ingredients that would blow everyone away, though what I did create was really excellent. I began to simmer the lentils, to start the soup, and set the timer for 20 minutes while I chopped veggies. 10 minutes in, I noticed on my trusty routing software, that one of my drivers was stuck in the canyon for a little while and his phone wasn’t on. Concerned about what might be going on, I turned the heat off and dashed to Topanga to find him. I wasn’t sure what would become of this soup.
The soup wasn’t ruined, in fact when I arrived back, I found the soaking of the lentils for 30 minutes was done just right, and I began to put the rest of the ingredients in the pot.
Here’s some main things that made this recipe so great.
~Snake gourd. This is the best squash I’ve ever had. I’ve seen it nowhere. I asked a farmer to grow it for my company Earth Matterz, and he did.
~French Green Lentils have amazing texture. I get them from Kandarian Farm, which is the best you can get locally in LA. Also available at Earth Matterz.
~Shiso, lemon balm, and lemon thyme are an incredible mix of flavors for this stew.
~If I found my cumin, I would have added 2 teaspoons.
~If I had more time I would have added some rind of orange. I also would have picked the eggplant I had, to add on top of the stew.
This stew is amazing!
Snake Gourd and Lentil Stew
1 cup of french green lentils
4-5 cups of water
Tomatoes (a lb or less is enough)
1 red onion
A few sprigs of shiso, lemon balm, and at least half a bunch of lemon thyme.
Snake gourd (as much as you want, I used half of one that weights about 1.5 lbs.)
1 lb of potatoes
1 banana pepper
1 spicy hanako pepper
Handful of baby spinach
3 or more Passion Fruit
First, simmer the lentils for 20 minutes in 4-5 cups of water.
Stir fry the onions and a sweet pepper on a pan on low heat with olive oil. Once it browns and caramelizes, pour it into the simmering lentils.
After 10 minutes. Add freshly chopped tomatoes. Cut the passion fruit in half and spoon out the juice into the pot. Don’t use the shells of passion fruit. I know that sounds crazy, but I’ve known people to try it. That’s almost like eating fiber glass. Add the hanako pepper or another spicy pepper. Rather than to chop up the pepper, I cut the pepper in half, take the seeds out, and let it simmer in there. Then I take the pepper out when the stew is ready. Chop the fresh herbs and throw them in the pot.
Add the chopped potatoes. I chop them up really small so that they cook faster. After about 5 minutes of the potatoes cooking, I add the chopped squash. Cook until the squash is tender, turn off the heat, and stir in a handful of spinach.
These types of unique flavors and elements, are how I won the chili cook off years ago. It’s about finding unique ingredients, which you can find at Earth Matterz. 🙂
Last night I watched the Mr. Rogers movie until 3am. There’s a part where Opera talks to Mr. Rogers and he says as Parents we just need to remember what it was like to be a little one. She asks him why we forget what it’s like to be a little one?
There was something that I never forgot when I was a teenager, and it stayed with me all these years.
When I was 13, I wrote in my journal to make sure that I wouldn’t forget. I since lost the journal but it was such a big moment that writing it kept it in my memory forever. I remember how it felt to be me as a teen, as I cried my eyes out into my journal, feeling unloved and untrusted for my expression.
It was the biggest promise I made to my older self. It was so absolutely important to me.
I promised that when I had kids I would let them express themselves how they wanted to. I would let them wear the clothes they wanted to wear. I would celebrate their originality, and I would trust that they knew their path in life, and that they could safely express their individual style.
I used to wear rainbow tights to school and get yelled at for it. I would sometimes wear a cape, or marker my nose purple. Or see what would happen if I walked into class without shoes. I wore a midriff to celebrate my own body. Having small breasts was unusual and people thought I should get breast surgery later. So my way of celebrating my individual body type was to wear midriffs. Unfortunately, my family was concerned about me wearing midriffs and I was yelled at for it. So I cried into my journal.
My Journaling worked, and I never forgot that feeling when I was writing it. I have a 16 year old Son today who does just that. Celebrates his original style. With neon green hair, a hello kitty mask, one earring on his ear, and a nose ring. He’s also ultra responsible, very talented, incredibly kind and polite, and very responsible! 🙂
I’m in Ashland Oregon, to enter into 4 days of meditating in a dark room. No light, no phone, no computer. I’ve prepared for it all month.
I’m going in just in time, to see all the wonderful black and white photos of Women empowering each other on instagram.
I had some curry soup last night from a local organic little shop, and I was feeling scared. The Angel Warrior sent a message to tell me nothing would come up that I can’t handle. I laughed and cried as he also said, sometimes I might feel like I just want to get out of there.
In High School, I played the role of Helen Keller. When I got the role, I had never been so happy. I wanted to play the role so much, and I got to. I was a method Actress, and so I spent time in a dark closet to practice. I taught myself to knit with my eyes closed, and fell off the stage blindfolded once. I had some crazy bruises on my body. For not being able to speak, it was still one of the best roles of my life. So when I heard about the darkness retreat, I knew it was for me. After having experienced a taste of it in High School.
This journey from painful and transformational times to becoming the Soup Sorceress began 7 years ago. In that time, I have overcome incredible obstacles to do what I believe in, and I finally got to this point: Literally, there were times I had to push my way through mazes, and I got out ok, tears and bruises later. Times where I thought I might not make it here today.
Recently, I asked my favorite artist, friend, and fellow blogger, Sean Colgin, to do one very important thing on my logo. The face! The logo was incredible, but the face made me feel uncomfortable. It’s amazing how the littlest simple details in life can make a huge impact. His style is particularly special.
Now, my face is at the vibration that I have wanted it to be for years! Such auspicious timing and synchronistic compatibility with the Universe’s magical flow of events, was in alignment for a long time coming.
In the same timing my graphic designer redid the label design for me. (I had been using a label program for years and it was bothering me so much.) Finally I could pay a pro!
The universe had this planned. The new flavor I was guided to create, came in the timing that my new lovable face arrived! I feel a whole lot of lovable.
I thought I was going to make the strength broth, but the Universe had a better plan.
The Herbs Were Waiting for My Arrival
For over a year, every time I ran into Kerry (an Astrologer, and intuitive farmer) at Erewhon, we mentioned something here or there about what was on her farm. She was very mysterious about what herbs she had available to me.
I drove past her farm on my way to the ocean and almost stopped in. I decided I would likely see her the next day. It’s rare I see her at Erewhon at all, but somehow I knew. When I saw her at the Whon, we stopped for a moment.
“I just drove past your farm, and wanted to ask what herbs you have,”
“Wait a second, you had the intuition to come to my farm and you didn’t do it?”
I looked up and to the left.
“The answer isn’t over there, it’s right here.” She said as she guided my eyes back to hers.
“Well, I knew we would be here right now.”
At The Farm
Long story short, I drove to Zuma a few days later to go to the farm.
“Is Kerry here?” I told one of her helpers.
“What company are you from?”
“Soup Sorceress. Do you have nettles right now?”
“No she’s out harvesting it, you can come back tomorrow for it.”
I asked again if I could wait a little longer for nettles. I wanted to make the Strength broth. “What other herbs do you have?”
The first herb he showed me was the one, I just didn’t know it yet.
“We have this one called lovage.”
After having a taste, I looked up on google about what it was good for. It’s used to attract more love.
I found lavender on the table, and there it was. The lovable broth was born.
From the flavors: Cleansing, to Soothing, to Strength, to Happiness, to Lovable, my collection of broths were at it’s best point yet. Each one with a unique story of tears and love, guided by the essence of a world of dynamic synchronistic endeavors on various levels.
I couldn’t wait to take the lovable broth to Erewhon! To say that this meant something to me is an understatement. Making the broth costs more money than what it’s being sold for. I do this because I believe in the magic of how I’ve been guided to create it and what it can do for the World.
Where Did the Broth Go?
As soon as I walked in the store the next day, I knew something was off. Something told me that when I looked in the soup section where my broths are usually displayed, that they wouldn’t be there. Sure enough, they weren’t.
I took a moment as I began to feel strange fiery bubbling feelings in my heart, and I knew where to go. I quickly walked straight to the back of the store, where the bone broth is. And there I was. How would my vegan fans know where to find me now?
My lovable broth that was years in the making ended up next to a pile of meat. Lol. I felt like I was going backwards in time. My body and mind was scared that I had to work my way up to the ideal shelf again. How was I going to get myself through this one? I had already gotten through the hardest parts. Empowering new obstacles are one thing, but taking steps back is another.
You know what else made me feel like I was going back in time? I remembered being in class in 2nd grade as we talked about the riots. I was so young I hardly understood what was going on but it felt sad.
I went back to the soup section. Something snapped in me. I stared at those bottles of soup and just let the tears go. Happy to have a mask on, I didn’t move a muscle.
All the grief came rushing up. So did the feelings about the reason I created this magic in the first place. And I just stood silent, staring at soups thinking about how many people feel like they’re unnoticed and unloved.
Does anyone else feel like we went back in time? It started out so surreal, with neighborhoods looking happy and people going outside on bikes and little power wheels cars. We greeted each other with real warmth, and said things like, “Stay healthy!” We made eye contact above our masks. It felt like the innocent days of my childhood. The vibration felt like a lot of health and kindness. And then violence broke out on the streets, and I was back in 2nd grade again, talking about the riots on the freeway.
Looking at the soups through tear-streaked eyes, and butterfly sunglasses, not knowing how much mascara was all over my face, I thought about how many people feel invisible and angry. As my heartstrings were pulling, tightening, and feeling in disarray, I felt into what they may be feeling when they are feeling unseen.
Peaceful and happy as I can be, when I feel unnoticed, or when I’ve given so much love and received a lot less back, there have been moments I’ve experienced a sense of unexplainable trauma inside of my body. As I stared at the soups, while grabbing a dragon fruit drink to make me feel better, I felt a flare of an emotional impulse, that I wasn’t sure what to do with yet. What action was I going to take? How would I trust the Universe in this moment, when I felt so lost?
I stood there thinking about all people who feel unseen, who don’t have access to magical food- or any food. People dealing with the crime brought on by poverty and desperation, and the terror from being occupied by an often brutal police force. And thinking about how many people have tried a lot in life and were still unseen. So they lash out. I stared at the soups and cried.
I let my tears be all over my face. I don’t hide them anymore.
Lightening Things Up
I knew I would find the right guy to talk to and I immediately did! I walked over to the lovely man who handles shelf placement. I don’t always see him, but he was there at that moment. I mustered up the strength with mascara tears on my cheeks, to ask with joy and sweetness if my vegan broths could be moved to their usual place. He softly and kindly said. “Oh yes, someone just put them in the wrong spot, I’ll move it over! I know where they go.”
I thanked him gratefully, and maybe even a lot more cheerfulness than necessary.
Sometimes we feel unnoticed/unseen, but there are solutions around the corner. It’s hard to know in those moments when we don’t feel good, it’s hard to know how the Universe has our back. And he was literally right behind my back at the right moment. Then I think about, what can we do to help other people so that we can dissolve this pain forever, and make the world feel better for everyone.
In that spirit, I bring you the Lovable Broth. It was created to generate love in you, so you know that you are lovable no matter what. It is symbolic of the journey of moving from a place of feeling unnoticed and unloved, to a place of empowerment. This is how I transform. It’s what I call Phoenixing.
Two days later the broth was in the soup section, but it’s even better than that. The broth is in both sections now. Next to the bone broth and the vegetable soups.
Spreading lots of lovability from one corner of the store to another. So lovable is everywhere for everyone. That’s a first for my broth and what great timing.
This is a picture of my friend Ashely who surprised me on instagram with this photo.
This drink is my way of saying: I love you.
The shelf placement story was just symbolic to the journey, and it always works out better, even if there’s a moment of uncertainty.
I do my best to remember if I’m feeling down, “maybe this is planned to be better than you think it is, you just don’t know it yet.”
I made nothing of it, other than letting myself be alone and unseen. Allowing it, felt better than trying to be seen and not feeling good that I wasn’t seen.
Sending blessings to everyone who needs more strength today.
A Man would say to me, “Great spirits often receive violent opposition from mediocre minds.” Which is basically an Albert Einstein quote, said a little differently.
Every challenge I’ve been through with people, that felt crushing to my spirit, made sense when he said that. Suddenly, my sensitive heart was acknowledged.
After I pheonix and rebirth, which is so often my reality, having 5 planets in Scorpio, I create something. That’s how I gain my clarity, strength, and empowerment.
I sat down alone at Erewhon. One of the most craziest nature people from Topanga that I know, sat down when I said hello. His stories are so out there, most people are flabbergasted. I don’t know if I can share the worst one, it’s so crazy! It’s really great to sit and listen to his stories. I awaited his latest tale when he sat down. He told me how he picked up a poisonous, deadly lizard and was so happy because he had been waiting to find that lizard for years! He looks forward to the day when he can hold an anaconda snake. I listened to him, hardly saying many words.
“You seem softer now.” he said. I softly agreed. I feel like more of an Angel Super Hero then yesterday.
Retrograde in Pisces
This mercury retrograde has been a mix of everything.
I replaced the gorgeous pink stone in my 50 year old necklace that had sadly fallen out, with cats eye stone. A few days later, it was hailing and raining in the morning and life had sadness, I cried puddles. A few hours later, the sun came out, and the next thing I knew, the Angel Warrior and I rode off in my adventure car, with a miraculous rainbow by our side. We drove around the town for an hour while he sang and I danced to India Arie and other songs, alternating my hands, feet, and face out the window in the cool air.
That’s when my favorite necklace fell into pieces all around me. It felt like being in a dream where nothing in the physical reality was a concern. Until it was again, and we both had a sling shot of reality. I knew when I saw the rainbow, that as magical as it was, I’ve been in rainbow moments before. Rainbow moments are incredible and they can be a bit illusionary too. Put some highly sensitive people in a rainbow moment and it can be quite entertaining. We did feel so free in that moment.
The Strength Broth
My happiness broth had sold out, and nettles arrived back in season. It was time to bring in the Strength broth to Erewhon. I needed more strength. I felt we could all use more strength through the retrograde. In fact, I’m stronger now then I was when I first created the strength broth. When the Universe created this flavor through me, it was a time where I was growing stronger in being myself.
Out in the World
Yesterday, at barworks class, the Teacher said. “You are stronger then you think.” And left us with a few more words about strength in life on our way out the door.
The Angel Warrior, who is still recovering his strength from the trauma of false accusations, (this is explained in my last post) called and told me that he spent 3 hours walking around town and picking up trash. 3 hours! He’s gaining so much strength inside, that he’s starting to feel the muscles pop out of his arms like a super hero.
Today, my Wizard and I took a hike. We found a car. “That 50 year old car would not be an easy trash pick up”, I thought to myself.
“This is the end of the trail.” my Wizard said, as we stopped at a beautiful oak tree, after having escaped bushes and bushes of poison oak.
“Wait.” I said. “I need some time with this tree.”
I hugged the tree, and slowly caressed it with the lightest fairy touch. “Thank you oak tree. Please give me more strength to be more me. I love you.”
If you’ve never stopped to hug a tree and soak in it’s wisdom, you’re in for a treat when you discover this. I spent a decade in Topanga Canyon and made nature my first priority. It’s the best.
My Wizard tried to tell me a story on the way back, but I was too distracted by looking at my tree picture. “I’m stronger than you are.” he mentioned. He might be right, he’s 12 years wiser.
And so… The theme of the tail end of mercury retrograde is, strength! I am stronger than I was the first time this flavor was created. Everything I’ve created, and am working on, and all the magic and harsh realities I’ve witnessed, is creating more strength in me then ever. I told a new friend at Erewhon, “there’s magic in the beginning of the retrograde, during it, and there will be magic after it.” Even if there was a lot of tough stuff in it. Magic happens. We’ll get through this and come out better. For me it’s another rebirth, and I thank everyone who has been a part of it.
May all beings have strength and be more of who they are. May all beings love with strength. May all beings find the solitude of nature.
If you love to hike and you like to avoid poison oak, I designed these organic cotton leg warmers for Women. I wear them in dance and yoga classes too! They’re totally cute! I get compliments all the time. The reason I like them on hikes, is that if I brush against poison oak on my calves, it’s easy for me to take these off and wash them separately of everything else, while still keeping my pants on. It’s really great. Even better, is that they look cute. You won’t find this fabric anywhere else, because it’s an original print. Check them out on Etsy!
This post is a story that’s a little about the “me too” movement, a devastating tower moment, and what inspired me to make this heart warming split pea soup. Recipe below.
The Angel Warrior
I was out to dinner with an Angel Warrior, but there was a problem. I ordered split pea soup and an artichoke. The split pea soup was a pile of mush of peas, with no seasoning. Literally, it was like a thick swamp that Shrek would swim in, and even he wouldn’t enjoy eating it. In front of me was a Man, feeding my Soul, so I was happy.
“We need a Soup Sorceress in every restaurant, like we have bakers,” I said.
It was a dark time. The Angel Warrior had a glaze over his eyes, mouth dropping, as he peered at his phone then back to me to try to hear me but he couldn’t. He just couldn’t at all. A girl was threatening to spread lies about him all over the internet. Maybe in her mind it wasn’t a lie. He was being “me too’d”. I only know him as the purest and kindest heart and soul, who is loving and respectful. I am someone who survived abuse in the past, so I take it all seriously. I’ve seen and experienced a lot, and he’s far from being a harmful human.
I watched him as he felt the wonderful things he created begin to crumble before him. As positive as he could turn the situation, this was challenging on another level.
I feel like it’s important to address that sometimes there are really good Men being accused of things that aren’t true, and people are afraid. I also know how challenging of a road it’s been for me in the past to express boundaries to Men, so that things are clear, and not just expect them to read my mind and lead the way. Which can cause little situations of discomfort that can ultimately be addressed between the two in a way that will help both people grow. I am fully in support of helping other Women understand their own boundaries and feelings. I’m refining mine all the time, and I’ve come a long way. When people claim to be abused in a situation, but really weren’t, it’s incredibly harmful to the other person.
Tis the season of Retrograde in Pisces, so our ability to transcend through challenges right now is what we can enjoy focusing on.
The Funny Soup
“You must love that soup,” someone said, as I plopped a spoon into the mush and put it in my mouth to make sure I didn’t go too hungry. I was just laughing inside, I was really happy with my artichoke.
“If restaurants paid as much attention to the beautiful art of soup like our wonderfully artistic bakers, the world would be better for it.”
The waitress came by with the check and said, “do you want to take your soup home?”
“No thank you.”
She seemed surprised.
We walked out the door. “How would you do a split pea soup?” The Angel Warrior said. I closed my mouth at any possible snotty comment that could’ve accidentally spit out of me about bad soups. Just kidding, I’m not criticizer, I’m a transformer. I was excited. I began envisioning. I went to Erewhon a couple of days later and picked up the peas.
The Internet Exploded and the Tower Crashed
Several days later the threat became real, and the internet was swarmed with rumors about him. I didn’t know what had happened yet, and I went to yoga feeling really sad and heavy. It was so challenging! I looked at the front desk and picked out two bracelets. It was time for me to get a new one after the last one fell off. It keeps me in a happier feminine vibe. I suppose if I wasn’t so sad, I wouldn’t have been compelled in that moment to pick up what I needed.
The purpose of the little bracelet was to set your intention. I chose to spread love and joy to all beings. The other bracelet was rose quartz.
Unable to stick around the house after a call with the Angel Warrior, finding out the tower was falling, I went to Erewhon for lunch.
When the tower falls something more beautiful arises. Though, when the tower is falling it can be tumultuous.
I sat alone with my soup. There’s no food that makes me feel better and so balanced. Never under estimate the power of a good, warm, healthy soup. Take it in slow. Set an intention and blessing for it to fill your body with heart and soul. Really feel that in each bite. You will feel so magical in your space. When I started making soups with the best ingredients, inspirations, and intentions, it changed my life. I’m pretty sure there’s nothing healthier.
I cried a few times that day. I just felt like there was such an injustice to him, and anyone who is being accused of something that isn’t true.
Stop to Smell the Roses
Even though I knew that everything would be ok at some point. I couldn’t look at the internet. Nothing inside my body and mind wanted to. I’ve been ignoring facebook for at least 3 years, so it was easy. I got home to tell my Psychic Wizard Angel about it, as he laid in his bed half asleep.
“Hello, little cute Elf!” I said cheerfully with the intention power of my bracelet!
“What’s going on?”
I told him what happened to the Angel Warrior.
“Don’t put any attention to them”, he said with his eyes closed and a sleepy voice. “Just rise above it. Don’t go into their pig trough on the internet.”
So I took a walk, and smelled the roses.
I thought about myself a year from now, looking back; that I will remember this as a time where the inevitable unfolding process of transcending consciousness took a step forward, which I know will happen soon, as the truth comes to light. In the best way for all beings.
Blessings For All
May the truth come to light in ways that will help more and more beings heal to higher levels then we ever realized. May all beings transcend. May all beings be honest. May all beings see truth. May all beings be in their fullest expression. May all beings feel the freedom of being who they really are.
Split Pea Soup
Here’s my version of split pea soup. I plan to work on this even more, but I promise you it’s a good one.
No need to put a lot of split peas. Just some is enough, but definitely put twice as much as I did, if you feel like it. Use any in season veggies you have available. This is what I used.
22 cups of water
1 big parsnip
2 1/2 cups of split peas (one package)
Baby Tat Soi
Calendula Flowers on top
salt and pepper
~Chop the leeks and boil the water with the leeks and rosemary in it.
~Add the split peas and simmer for 3o minutes.
~Add the chopped cauliflower and parsnips.
~Simmer for 10 more minutes.
~Turn of the heat and add tat soi, or any green you like.
~Top the soup with olive oil, lemon, and calendula flowers.