There’s a certain satisfaction that comes with it being the end of a hard day. Especially if we accept it as part of life instead of trying hard to get the law of attraction right and figure out what is wrong with us for hours. Just knowing that we survived that day and its circumstances, and having faith in ourselves going forward is a good moment. Especially with soup and chocolate. I was feeling pretty satisfied at my tough day once I escaped to nature at night to listen to crickets.
In the middle of the day, I wanted to make the lentil stew I had planned, and finally got it started once my team left for the day to make deliveries. There never seems to be enough time to add the last few ingredients that would blow everyone away, though what I did create was really excellent. I began to simmer the lentils, to start the soup, and set the timer for 20 minutes while I chopped veggies. 10 minutes in, I noticed on my trusty routing software, that one of my drivers was stuck in the canyon for a little while and his phone wasn’t on. Concerned about what might be going on, I turned the heat off and dashed to Topanga to find him. I wasn’t sure what would become of this soup.
The soup wasn’t ruined, in fact when I arrived back, I found the soaking of the lentils for 30 minutes was done just right, and I began to put the rest of the ingredients in the pot.
Here’s some main things that made this recipe so great.
~Snake gourd. This is the best squash I’ve ever had. I’ve seen it nowhere. I asked a farmer to grow it for my company Earth Matterz, and he did.
~French Green Lentils have amazing texture. I get them from Kandarian Farm, which is the best you can get locally in LA. Also available at Earth Matterz.
~Shiso, lemon balm, and lemon thyme are an incredible mix of flavors for this stew.
~If I found my cumin, I would have added 2 teaspoons.
~If I had more time I would have added some rind of orange. I also would have picked the eggplant I had, to add on top of the stew.
This stew is amazing!
Snake Gourd and Lentil Stew
1 cup of french green lentils
4-5 cups of water
Tomatoes (a lb or less is enough)
1 red onion
A few sprigs of shiso, lemon balm, and at least half a bunch of lemon thyme.
Snake gourd (as much as you want, I used half of one that weights about 1.5 lbs.)
1 lb of potatoes
1 banana pepper
1 spicy hanako pepper
Handful of baby spinach
3 or more Passion Fruit
First, simmer the lentils for 20 minutes in 4-5 cups of water.
Stir fry the onions and a sweet pepper on a pan on low heat with olive oil. Once it browns and caramelizes, pour it into the simmering lentils.
After 10 minutes. Add freshly chopped tomatoes. Cut the passion fruit in half and spoon out the juice into the pot. Don’t use the shells of passion fruit. I know that sounds crazy, but I’ve known people to try it. That’s almost like eating fiber glass. Add the hanako pepper or another spicy pepper. Rather than to chop up the pepper, I cut the pepper in half, take the seeds out, and let it simmer in there. Then I take the pepper out when the stew is ready. Chop the fresh herbs and throw them in the pot.
Add the chopped potatoes. I chop them up really small so that they cook faster. After about 5 minutes of the potatoes cooking, I add the chopped squash. Cook until the squash is tender, turn off the heat, and stir in a handful of spinach.
These types of unique flavors and elements, are how I won the chili cook off years ago. It’s about finding unique ingredients, which you can find at Earth Matterz. 🙂
Last night I watched the Mr. Rogers movie until 3am. There’s a part where Opera talks to Mr. Rogers and he says as Parents we just need to remember what it was like to be a little one. She asks him why we forget what it’s like to be a little one?
There was something that I never forgot when I was a teenager, and it stayed with me all these years.
When I was 13, I wrote in my journal to make sure that I wouldn’t forget. I since lost the journal but it was such a big moment that writing it kept it in my memory forever. I remember how it felt to be me as a teen, as I cried my eyes out into my journal, feeling unloved and untrusted for my expression.
It was the biggest promise I made to my older self. It was so absolutely important to me.
I promised that when I had kids I would let them express themselves how they wanted to. I would let them wear the clothes they wanted to wear. I would celebrate their originality, and I would trust that they knew their path in life, and that they could safely express their individual style.
I used to wear rainbow tights to school and get yelled at for it. I would sometimes wear a cape, or marker my nose purple. Or see what would happen if I walked into class without shoes. I wore a midriff to celebrate my own body. Having small breasts was unusual and people thought I should get breast surgery later. So my way of celebrating my individual body type was to wear midriffs and I was yelled at for that. So I cried into my journal.
My Journaling worked, and I never forgot that feeling when I was writing it. I have a 16 year old Son today who does just that. Celebrates his original style. With neon green hair, a hello kitty mask, one earring on his ear, and a nose ring. He’s also ultra responsible, very talented, incredibly kind and polite, and gets mostly A’s in school. 🙂
I’m in Ashland Oregon, to enter into 4 days of meditating in a dark room. No light, no phone, no computer. I’ve prepared for it all month.
I’m going in just in time, to see all the wonderful black and white photos of Women empowering each other on instagram.
I had some curry soup last night from a local organic little shop, and I was feeling scared. The Angel Warrior sent a message to tell me nothing would come up that I can’t handle. I laughed and cried as he also said, sometimes I might feel like I just want to get out of there.
In High School, I played the role of Helen Keller. When I got the role, I had never been so happy. I wanted to play the role so much, and I got to. I was a method Actress, and so I spent time in a dark closet to practice. I taught myself to knit with my eyes closed, and fell off the stage blindfolded once. I had some crazy bruises on my body. For not being able to speak, it was still one of the best roles of my life. So when I heard about the darkness retreat, I knew it was for me. After having experienced a taste of it in High School.
This journey from painful and transformational times to becoming the Soup Sorceress began 7 years ago. In that time, I have overcome incredible obstacles to do what I believe in, and I finally got to this point: Literally, there were times I had to push my way through mazes, and I got out ok, tears and bruises later. Times where I thought I might not make it here today.
Recently, I asked my favorite artist, friend, and fellow blogger, Sean Colgin, to do one very important thing on my logo. The face! The logo was incredible, but the face made me feel uncomfortable. It’s amazing how the littlest simple details in life can make a huge impact. His style is particularly special.
Now, my face is at the vibration that I have wanted it to be for years! Such auspicious timing and synchronistic compatibility with the Universe’s magical flow of events, was in alignment for a long time coming.
In the same timing my graphic designer redid the label design for me. (I had been using a label program for years and it was bothering me so much.) Finally I could pay a pro!
The universe had this planned. The new flavor I was guided to create, came in the timing that my new lovable face arrived! I feel a whole lot of lovable.
I thought I was going to make the strength broth, but the Universe had a better plan.
The Herbs Were Waiting for My Arrival
For over a year, every time I ran into Kerry (an Astrologer, and intuitive farmer) at Erewhon, we mentioned something here or there about what was on her farm. She was very mysterious about what herbs she had available to me.
I drove past her farm on my way to the ocean and almost stopped in. I decided I would likely see her the next day. It’s rare I see her at Erewhon at all, but somehow I knew. When I saw her at the Whon, we stopped for a moment.
“I just drove past your farm, and wanted to ask what herbs you have,”
“Wait a second, you had the intuition to come to my farm and you didn’t do it?”
I looked up and to the left.
“The answer isn’t over there, it’s right here.” She said as she guided my eyes back to hers.
“Well, I knew we would be here right now.”
At The Farm
Long story short, I drove to Zuma a few days later to go to the farm.
“Is Kerry here?” I told one of her helpers.
“What company are you from?”
“Soup Sorceress. Do you have nettles right now?”
“No she’s out harvesting it, you can come back tomorrow for it.”
I asked again if I could wait a little longer for nettles. I wanted to make the Strength broth. “What other herbs do you have?”
The first herb he showed me was the one, I just didn’t know it yet.
“We have this one called lovage.”
After having a taste, I looked up on google about what it was good for. It’s used to attract more love.
I found lavender on the table, and there it was. The lovable broth was born.
From the flavors: Cleansing, to Soothing, to Strength, to Happiness, to Lovable, my collection of broths were at it’s best point yet. Each one with a unique story of tears and love, guided by the essence of a world of dynamic synchronistic endeavors on various levels.
I couldn’t wait to take the lovable broth to Erewhon! To say that this meant something to me is an understatement. Making the broth costs more money than what it’s being sold for. I do this because I believe in the magic of how I’ve been guided to create it and what it can do for the World.
Where Did the Broth Go?
As soon as I walked in the store the next day, I knew something was off. Something told me that when I looked in the soup section where my broths are usually displayed, that they wouldn’t be there. Sure enough, they weren’t.
I took a moment as I began to feel strange fiery bubbling feelings in my heart, and I knew where to go. I quickly walked straight to the back of the store, where the bone broth is. And there I was. How would my vegan fans know where to find me now?
My lovable broth that was years in the making ended up next to a pile of meat. Lol. I felt like I was going backwards in time. My body and mind was scared that I had to work my way up to the ideal shelf again. How was I going to get myself through this one? I had already gotten through the hardest parts. Empowering new obstacles are one thing, but taking steps back is another.
You know what else made me feel like I was going back in time? I remembered being in class in 2nd grade as we talked about the riots. I was so young I hardly understood what was going on but it felt sad.
I went back to the soup section. Something snapped in me. I stared at those bottles of soup and just let the tears go. Happy to have a mask on, I didn’t move a muscle.
All the grief came rushing up. So did the feelings about the reason I created this magic in the first place. And I just stood silent, staring at soups thinking about how many people feel like they’re unnoticed and unloved.
Does anyone else feel like we went back in time? It started out so surreal, with neighborhoods looking happy and people going outside on bikes and little power wheels cars. We greeted each other with real warmth, and said things like, “Stay healthy!” We made eye contact above our masks. It felt like the innocent days of my childhood. The vibration felt like a lot of health and kindness. And then violence broke out on the streets, and I was back in 2nd grade again, talking about the riots on the freeway.
Looking at the soups through tear-streaked eyes, and butterfly sunglasses, not knowing how much mascara was all over my face, I thought about how many people feel invisible and angry. As my heartstrings were pulling, tightening, and feeling in disarray, I felt into what they may be feeling when they are feeling unseen.
Peaceful and happy as I can be, when I feel unnoticed, or when I’ve given so much love and received a lot less back, there have been moments I’ve experienced a sense of unexplainable trauma inside of my body. As I stared at the soups, while grabbing a dragon fruit drink to make me feel better, I felt a flare of an emotional impulse, that I wasn’t sure what to do with yet. What action was I going to take? How would I trust the Universe in this moment, when I felt so lost?
I stood there thinking about all people who feel unseen, who don’t have access to magical food- or any food. People dealing with the crime brought on by poverty and desperation, and the terror from being occupied by an often brutal police force. And thinking about how many people have tried a lot in life and were still unseen. So they lash out. I stared at the soups and cried.
I let my tears be all over my face. I don’t hide them anymore.
Lightening Things Up
I knew I would find the right guy to talk to and I immediately did! I walked over to the lovely man who handles shelf placement. I don’t always see him, but he was there at that moment. I mustered up the strength with mascara tears on my cheeks, to ask with joy and sweetness if my vegan broths could be moved to their usual place. He softly and kindly said. “Oh yes, someone just put them in the wrong spot, I’ll move it over! I know where they go.”
I thanked him gratefully, and maybe even a lot more cheerfulness than necessary.
Sometimes we feel unnoticed/unseen, but there are solutions around the corner. It’s hard to know in those moments when we don’t feel good, it’s hard to know how the Universe has our back. And he was literally right behind my back at the right moment. Then I think about, what can we do to help other people so that we can dissolve this pain forever, and make the world feel better for everyone.
In that spirit, I bring you the Lovable Broth. It was created to generate love in you, so you know that you are lovable no matter what. It is symbolic of the journey of moving from a place of feeling unnoticed and unloved, to a place of empowerment. This is how I transform. It’s what I call Phoenixing.
Two days later the broth was in the soup section, but it’s even better than that. The broth is in both sections now. Next to the bone broth and the vegetable soups.
Spreading lots of lovability from one corner of the store to another. So lovable is everywhere for everyone. That’s a first for my broth and what great timing.
This is a picture of my friend Ashely who surprised me on instagram with this photo.
This drink is my way of saying: I love you.
The shelf placement story was just symbolic to the journey, and it always works out better, even if there’s a moment of uncertainty.
I do my best to remember if I’m feeling down, “maybe this is planned to be better than you think it is, you just don’t know it yet.”
I made nothing of it, other than letting myself be alone and unseen. Allowing it, felt better than trying to be seen and not feeling good that I wasn’t seen.
Sending blessings to everyone who needs more strength today.
A Man would say to me, “Great spirits often receive violent opposition from mediocre minds.” Which is basically an Albert Einstein quote, said a little differently.
Every challenge I’ve been through with people, that felt crushing to my spirit, made sense when he said that. Suddenly, my sensitive heart was acknowledged.
After I pheonix and rebirth, which is so often my reality, having 5 planets in Scorpio, I create something. That’s how I gain my clarity, strength, and empowerment.
I sat down alone at Erewhon. One of the most craziest nature people from Topanga that I know, sat down when I said hello. His stories are so out there, most people are flabbergasted. I don’t know if I can share the worst one, it’s so crazy! It’s really great to sit and listen to his stories. I awaited his latest tale when he sat down. He told me how he picked up a poisonous, deadly lizard and was so happy because he had been waiting to find that lizard for years! He looks forward to the day when he can hold an anaconda snake. I listened to him, hardly saying many words.
“You seem softer now.” he said. I softly agreed. I feel like more of an Angel Super Hero then yesterday.
Retrograde in Pisces
This mercury retrograde has been a mix of everything.
I replaced the gorgeous pink stone in my 50 year old necklace that had sadly fallen out, with cats eye stone. A few days later, it was hailing and raining in the morning and life had sadness, I cried puddles. A few hours later, the sun came out, and the next thing I knew, the Angel Warrior and I rode off in my adventure car, with a miraculous rainbow by our side. We drove around the town for an hour while he sang and I danced to India Arie and other songs, alternating my hands, feet, and face out the window in the cool air.
That’s when my favorite necklace fell into pieces all around me. It felt like being in a dream where nothing in the physical reality was a concern. Until it was again, and we both had a sling shot of reality. I knew when I saw the rainbow, that as magical as it was, I’ve been in rainbow moments before. Rainbow moments are incredible and they can be a bit illusionary too. Put some highly sensitive people in a rainbow moment and it can be quite entertaining. We did feel so free in that moment.
The Strength Broth
My happiness broth had sold out, and nettles arrived back in season. It was time to bring in the Strength broth to Erewhon. I needed more strength. I felt we could all use more strength through the retrograde. In fact, I’m stronger now then I was when I first created the strength broth. When the Universe created this flavor through me, it was a time where I was growing stronger in being myself.
Out in the World
Yesterday, at barworks class, the Teacher said. “You are stronger then you think.” And left us with a few more words about strength in life on our way out the door.
The Angel Warrior, who is still recovering his strength from the trauma of false accusations, (this is explained in my last post) called and told me that he spent 3 hours walking around town and picking up trash. 3 hours! He’s gaining so much strength inside, that he’s starting to feel the muscles pop out of his arms like a super hero.
Today, my Wizard and I took a hike. We found a car. “That 50 year old car would not be an easy trash pick up”, I thought to myself.
“This is the end of the trail.” my Wizard said, as we stopped at a beautiful oak tree, after having escaped bushes and bushes of poison oak.
“Wait.” I said. “I need some time with this tree.”
I hugged the tree, and slowly caressed it with the lightest fairy touch. “Thank you oak tree. Please give me more strength to be more me. I love you.”
If you’ve never stopped to hug a tree and soak in it’s wisdom, you’re in for a treat when you discover this. I spent a decade in Topanga Canyon and made nature my first priority. It’s the best.
My Wizard tried to tell me a story on the way back, but I was too distracted by looking at my tree picture. “I’m stronger than you are.” he mentioned. He might be right, he’s 12 years wiser.
And so… The theme of the tail end of mercury retrograde is, strength! I am stronger than I was the first time this flavor was created. Everything I’ve created, and am working on, and all the magic and harsh realities I’ve witnessed, is creating more strength in me then ever. I told a new friend at Erewhon, “there’s magic in the beginning of the retrograde, during it, and there will be magic after it.” Even if there was a lot of tough stuff in it. Magic happens. We’ll get through this and come out better. For me it’s another rebirth, and I thank everyone who has been a part of it.
May all beings have strength and be more of who they are. May all beings love with strength. May all beings find the solitude of nature.
If you love to hike and you like to avoid poison oak, I designed these organic cotton leg warmers for Women. I wear them in dance and yoga classes too! They’re totally cute! I get compliments all the time. The reason I like them on hikes, is that if I brush against poison oak on my calves, it’s easy for me to take these off and wash them separately of everything else, while still keeping my pants on. It’s really great. Even better, is that they look cute. You won’t find this fabric anywhere else, because it’s an original print. Check them out on Etsy!
This post is a story that’s a little about the “me too” movement, a devastating tower moment, and what inspired me to make this heart warming split pea soup. Recipe below.
The Angel Warrior
I was out to dinner with an Angel Warrior, but there was a problem. I ordered split pea soup and an artichoke. The split pea soup was a pile of mush of peas, with no seasoning. Literally, it was like a thick swamp that Shrek would swim in, and even he wouldn’t enjoy eating it. In front of me was a Man, feeding my Soul, so I was happy.
“We need a Soup Sorceress in every restaurant, like we have bakers,” I said.
It was a dark time. The Angel Warrior had a glaze over his eyes, mouth dropping, as he peered at his phone then back to me to try to hear me but he couldn’t. He just couldn’t at all. A girl was threatening to spread lies about him all over the internet. Maybe in her mind it wasn’t a lie. He was being “me too’d”. I only know him as the purest and kindest heart and soul, who is loving and respectful. I am someone who survived abuse in the past, so I take it all seriously. I’ve seen and experienced a lot, and he’s far from being a harmful human.
I watched him as he felt the wonderful things he created begin to crumble before him. As positive as he could turn the situation, this was challenging on another level.
I feel like it’s important to address that sometimes there are really good Men being accused of things that aren’t true, and people are afraid. I also know how challenging of a road it’s been for me in the past to express boundaries to Men, so that things are clear, and not just expect them to read my mind and lead the way. Which can cause little situations of discomfort that can ultimately be addressed between the two in a way that will help both people grow. I am fully in support of helping other Women understand their own boundaries and feelings. I’m refining mine all the time, and I’ve come a long way. When people claim to be abused in a situation, but really weren’t, it’s incredibly harmful to the other person.
Tis the season of Retrograde in Pisces, so our ability to transcend through challenges right now is what we can enjoy focusing on.
The Funny Soup
“You must love that soup,” someone said, as I plopped a spoon into the mush and put it in my mouth to make sure I didn’t go too hungry. I was just laughing inside, I was really happy with my artichoke.
“If restaurants paid as much attention to the beautiful art of soup like our wonderfully artistic bakers, the world would be better for it.”
The waitress came by with the check and said, “do you want to take your soup home?”
“No thank you.”
She seemed surprised.
We walked out the door. “How would you do a split pea soup?” The Angel Warrior said. I closed my mouth at any possible snotty comment that could’ve accidentally spit out of me about bad soups. Just kidding, I’m not criticizer, I’m a transformer. I was excited. I began envisioning. I went to Erewhon a couple of days later and picked up the peas.
The Internet Exploded and the Tower Crashed
Several days later the threat became real, and the internet was swarmed with rumors about him. I didn’t know what had happened yet, and I went to yoga feeling really sad and heavy. It was so challenging! I looked at the front desk and picked out two bracelets. It was time for me to get a new one after the last one fell off. It keeps me in a happier feminine vibe. I suppose if I wasn’t so sad, I wouldn’t have been compelled in that moment to pick up what I needed.
The purpose of the little bracelet was to set your intention. I chose to spread love and joy to all beings. The other bracelet was rose quartz.
Unable to stick around the house after a call with the Angel Warrior, finding out the tower was falling, I went to Erewhon for lunch.
When the tower falls something more beautiful arises. Though, when the tower is falling it can be tumultuous.
I sat alone with my soup. There’s no food that makes me feel better and so balanced. Never under estimate the power of a good, warm, healthy soup. Take it in slow. Set an intention and blessing for it to fill your body with heart and soul. Really feel that in each bite. You will feel so magical in your space. When I started making soups with the best ingredients, inspirations, and intentions, it changed my life. I’m pretty sure there’s nothing healthier.
I cried a few times that day. I just felt like there was such an injustice to him, and anyone who is being accused of something that isn’t true.
Stop to Smell the Roses
Even though I knew that everything would be ok at some point. I couldn’t look at the internet. Nothing inside my body and mind wanted to. I’ve been ignoring facebook for at least 3 years, so it was easy. I got home to tell my Psychic Wizard Angel about it, as he laid in his bed half asleep.
“Hello, little cute Elf!” I said cheerfully with the intention power of my bracelet!
“What’s going on?”
I told him what happened to the Angel Warrior.
“Don’t put any attention to them”, he said with his eyes closed and a sleepy voice. “Just rise above it. Don’t go into their pig trough on the internet.”
So I took a walk, and smelled the roses.
I thought about myself a year from now, looking back; that I will remember this as a time where the inevitable unfolding process of transcending consciousness took a step forward, which I know will happen soon, as the truth comes to light. In the best way for all beings.
Blessings For All
May the truth come to light in ways that will help more and more beings heal to higher levels then we ever realized. May all beings transcend. May all beings be honest. May all beings see truth. May all beings be in their fullest expression. May all beings feel the freedom of being who they really are.
Split Pea Soup
Here’s my version of split pea soup. I plan to work on this even more, but I promise you it’s a good one.
No need to put a lot of split peas. Just some is enough, but definitely put twice as much as I did, if you feel like it. Use any in season veggies you have available. This is what I used.
22 cups of water
1 big parsnip
2 1/2 cups of split peas (one package)
Baby Tat Soi
Calendula Flowers on top
salt and pepper
~Chop the leeks and boil the water with the leeks and rosemary in it.
~Add the split peas and simmer for 3o minutes.
~Add the chopped cauliflower and parsnips.
~Simmer for 10 more minutes.
~Turn of the heat and add tat soi, or any green you like.
~Top the soup with olive oil, lemon, and calendula flowers.
Wednesday night I asked my Sister if I could FaceTime my 2 year old Niece. When I got her on the phone she was watching, “Alice and Wonderland”.
I started The Psychic School 3 months ago. It took a lot of time and research to choose a School. I was partially reliant on a couple of friends to help with my decision, including my most trusted Wizard Elf Psychic, to look over the possibilities with me. Some of my friends said, “you don’t even need school.” I didn’t agree. The structure and community makes me happy, and I welcome more tools to guide me more deeply. We work a lot on getting grounded, and I can get pretty ungrounded.
I wake up in the middle of the night with downloads sometimes. Usually between around 3-5am, maybe midnight or sometimes close to 6am.
I’ve yet to be able to explain in detail what is happening to me and how I’m feeling energy, and healing, while getting information from source. It’s an experience beyond words, somewhat in the way a lucid dream is. I call these experiences a “midnight awakening journey”. My entire body and mind feels different; a powerful vibration. It started when I was pregnant 16 years ago. I became more hyper sensitive than ever. A pregnancy can connect us ladies even more deeply to source and make us more sensitive.
I woke up Tuesday night with a vision. I have much greater stories than this one, including the dream I had the night before I lost my ring, but I enjoyed this little vision. I vividly watched me and my Wizard (who’s a psychic and incredible palm reader amongst other specialties) talking to each other in the kitchen as we do now every day, since we’ve been living together for a couple weeks. The intensity of the energy was heightened in the vision and a very clear voice said, “this is happening because you’re in psychic boot camp.” I woke up. “Oh my God, that makes so much sense now”, I thought to myself. We really are here in this house for a reason. I started Psychic School a month before he moved in, and now I’m also in psychic boot camp.
Soon after this vision, he knocked on my door. “Could you make use of these Vince pants? I just bought them and they don’t fit me.”
“These look like Man pants.” I said. He insisted that I try them on. I closed the door, and reluctantly, yet happily, put them on. A perfect fit! I came out of my room and into the kitchen.
“I feel really masculine in these, like I’m in the army. Don’t you want to return these? I like feminine clothes.” He insisted they were good pants for me and fit perfectly. I didn’t want to wear them until later I realized, they are psychic boot camp pants! I was so happy. The Universe is as funny as it is mysterious. It wasn’t so much the material itself I was grateful for as it was the timing and message from the cosmos. I just won’t be wearing these outside the house.
Boot Camp Conversations:
“You refuse to be mindful. I need you to breathe. You’re not breathing, I get ungrounded when you don’t breathe. Look, I always pick up my salt shaker perfectly on the side of the shaker without even looking, and this time I didn’t. You see? I become ungrounded in your energy when you get like this.” He says, as I stumble through the kitchen, dripping something anytime my mind wanders off into the outer-space of mumbo jumbo thought-land.
That’s a small example of our typical, daily conversation in the kitchen. For someone like him, with 5 planets in Virgo, it doesn’t make sense how I can drift, and it’s equally obnoxious when one has to deal with my little slip ups. Like when I spilled taco juice on my boot camp pants. Stained forever. I do laugh about these things.
At the table he said. “I will not accept talking to anything except your 100% authentic self. Maybe other people are ok with seeing all of the minutia of different characters you portray but not me. Save that for when someones paying you to play a character.”
When he said that, I looked at him in the eyes warping my imagination in swirls and colors and fell into a space of absolute comfort where I felt myself fully. I enjoyed the assertive permission for me to feel myself authentically all the way. It brought me back to being 11 years old, backstage at the Chamber Theater in Hollywood, when I played Alice in Wonderland in “Orphan Dreams”. I wanted to be there again. I was so happy to express myself on stage, and back stage I had a peace and solitude of just being myself. I felt safe in this world, free to express characters, and yet I was just this pure soul that knew how to be me. The stage and even behind the stage was always my happiest place.
One night my back was turned in the kitchen, after I had made us dinner. Mr. Wizard walked towards me quietly so I didn’t know he was there, and then popped up right behind me.
“You’re being a ninja!” I said. “My Son used to do that to me all the time when he was younger.”
Right then, it made me burst into tears over the beauty of this memory. “It was one of my favorite things my Son did when he was little. He went onto YouTube to learn how to be a ninja. He would sneak up on me quietly, going unnoticed and try to scare me as he came up right next to me. He got so much joy out of it.” Often I could feel him even if I couldn’t hear him, and I would turn around and catch him.
What Am I Thinking?
My Wizard will say things out loud that I’m already thinking, which often will make life much easier for me. It’s actually quite a relief.
We were in the garage looking at some salsa for the tacos, in the fridge. I lifted the lid up to ask him to take a look and smell to see if the salsa was still good. We agreed it was. So I began to walk back in the kitchen.
“Wait,” he said, while he was busy with the cat. “We came in here for lettuce and you’re walking back with salsa, come get the lettuce.” While I walked back towards the fridge, I still held the lid and the open jar of salsa. I wanted to put the lid on, but I wasn’t doing it. I was thinking I would be more comfortable if I did, but I didn’t do it. Without me saying a word, he said, “Go on, put the lid back on, make yourself more comfortable.” I often forget in life to stop waiting for people to give me permission to do things. It’s very odd programming, but I’m climbing out of it like it’s my favorite tree.
One night I was in the kitchen waiting for my Wizard to come in, and feeling apprehensive about what to start preparing and what would be ok with him. Then I realized, normally, I wait for him, so I can get permission on ingredients and flavoring because he’s so particular. That night I let go of my fear, and decided to just do the soup I wanted to do. I would for anyone else, but with him, it’s a different story. There was no need to wait! It doesn’t sound like much, but in that moment it was a big step up the tree for me. When we finished the soup he said, “That was amazing. Good job Mama.” I couldn’t believe it. He liked the soup.
And in the midst of it all, I’ve come alone, to the middle of the Forest today to get really grounded. Soaking in Mother Earth.
In Psychic School, pretty much the first thing we do in class, is to connect with our grounding cord.
Click this link if you would like to get started with the Psychic School! Enter the coupon code Magic101 for a discount on your 101 class.
In Gratitude. I say these blessings from the both of us in Psychic Boot Camp.
“May all beings be fed. May all beings be blessed. May all children be fed and healthy.”
Drink your green juice my Wizard messages with a smile, as I finish writing, and I feel like one of the luckiest girls in the world that I get to have this daily. He makes the juice every morning.
When I drink a cup of broth, I breathe better. I take in longer, fuller breaths of air that fill my lungs and soothe my body.
My last flavor broth, the Immunity & Intuition broth, sold out so quickly at Eerwhon, and the shelf was empty.
I had taken a few trips out of town, so it had sold quicker than I could make the next batch. I really escaped out of here. Something I want more often. I went to the snow in Lake Arrowhead and then to the pouring rain in San Mateo.
Yesterday, I arrived into Erewhon to see the Earth Angel sitting down, reading. I walked over, stood next to him, and told him a secret.
“My broth is sold out. I thought about doing the same one this week, but I’m doing the ‘Happiness’ broth tomorrow. Don’t tell anybody.” He promised he wouldn’t. I didn’t even know what I was in for when I decided to do it.
Why am I so secretive? So many things don’t need to be secret at all. It’s part unexplainable strategies I purposefully concoct with the best of intentions, and part having 5 planets in Scorpio in my astrology chart.
Intentions and Happy Stories
My intention was to create a happiness broth for the sake of feeling happiness for no reason at all. No story, no reason, nothing huge happened. Happiness is a state of mind. I feel so good just looking at these intelligent ingredients.
When you’re feeling happy and you get to share happiness with another human, it can be addictively fun.
I had a best friend 17 years ago. When we were around each other, everything was so much fun. We were the most spontaneous duo, and felt totally comfortable with each other. I never found anyone like her again, that could be so spontaneous like me.
Sometimes, we are challenged with feeling happiness on our own. It’s just the truth of life.
My Grandmother lost her Husband recently, (my Step Grandfather) he has passed. She told me a story about the day she got into the comfy king size bed in their vacation cabin, plopped the blankets on her, while her Husband was on a walk, and as the dog Charlie happily jumped on the bed, she said, “oh , Charlie, life doesn’t get better than this!” She had felt so safe on this Earth in that moment; she felt so happy. She is grieving her loss.
We all appreciate those moments when we get to feel so happy and exhilarated. Moments pass, and sometimes we have to remind ourselves extra, to be in a state of happiness, when some moments aren’t as exhilarating as others. Like the day I helped my Grandma remove some things from her cabin that was recently sold. She had been feeling so sad about losing the home, that she was happy I was there to make the day ok.
It was so hot because I was running up and down the stairs, carrying heavy things, so I had to put on a halter top in the snow. I felt pretty happy about that. Feeling warm in the cold air.
When we left, I locked the door, knocked on the wood and said, “good luck every body!” Sending blessings to all who enter the home in the future.
My Grandma said, “honey, any Man that doesn’t appreciate you is crazy.”
Sometimes, we see someone, who has happiness for no reason, they are just being it, and we remember how blessed we are. Someone who is humble, and just kindly doing their thing throughout the day, is refreshing.
I messaged Pegasus (a symbiotically creative spirit), and he asked how I was doing. Without any thought, I said, “I’m a little off today, but I’m working on it.”
What that meant was, I was trying hard to find that happiness space for no reason at all, for the broth, and it was challenging me. I felt happiness while I was making the broth, especially while stirring. I would walk away, and feel challenged. So I thought, maybe I am dissolving this challenge right here, right now, because I decided to create the happiness broth. (May all beings dissolve discomforts and feel happiness for no reason.)
Pegasus responded with a photo he took of a Man that inspires him. “It really captures him doing what he loves. Something so simple, yet so rewarding to an older Man, still full of so much life and happiness.”
End quote on “happiness”. I didn’t tell Pegasus my secret broth flavor yet; this just happened.
I took a walk. The sun was just going down. A Man wanted my attention, you know, energetically, so I decided to give him a happy hello as I walked past him carrying his trash cans in. “I would’ve given you a ride, as I passed by you,” he said kindly.
Although he was nice and not threatening, I thought, “maybe a hello wasn’t a good idea.”
“That’s ok, I’m just taking a walk on purpose.” I happily said as I walked a little more quickly and remembered to bring my pepper spray next time.
I kept walking. There were two Men passing by. They seemed a little low energy. It was starting to get dark. There were people far in the distance; shadows. One of the Men, had two dogs. A few feet after I passed him, there was an unforgettable dog smell. I clenched up and kept walking. There were sirens in the background. The flashing lights of the UPS truck parked next to me, reflected on and off the stop sign in the distance. I walked around a few rain puddles. This was no hike in Topanga. It was a city walk. It’s funny how for some of us, we feel safer around coyotes and owls. Though, I carried happiness with me.
I created this broth, so that we can all get drunk on happiness for no reason at all. And there’s nothing that brings me more life energy then to focus on my breath, which is how my body responds to drinking vegetable broth.
The star ingredients in this are shiitake mushroom, lions mane, gotu, kola, roses, and basil. So if you’re looking out the window on one of these gloomy winter days, come get yourself some happiness broth. Your breath, your body, your mind, will thank you.
If you want to make this on your own, simmer some veggies and add some of the ingredients I mentioned. You can also use chamomile, turmeric, ashwagandha, or lemon balm. Those are some feel good, happy herbs too.
Some Simple Things I Feel Happy About
Tonight as I simmer down from a busy day of a big simmering pot, I’m simply happy to feel and watch my delicious honey as it pours like thick liquid gold.
I’m happy Pegasus tuned in at the right timing, while he was in the middle of multi tasking business things. I just love that.
If you’re reading this, know that, I’m happy for you, for whatever little thing or nothing you can think of to feel happy about right now. I’m holding that space with all of my heart. If you feel sad, or you’re crying, I’m holding the feeling of happiness for you.
Lastly, something I’m really happy about. One of my closest and most trusted friends/psychic on the Earth Planet, held this wild bird in his hand for 15 minutes. How many people are so connected to nature that wild birds are comfortable to land on their hand, whilst petting it? The peace I feel knowing that he exists makes me happy. This picture feels too sacred to share.
May all beings be blessed. May all beings smile every day. May all beings feel happy for no reason at all. And happy for lots of reasons too. 😉
The day I had been preparing for was finally here. Here’s the story of a cauliflower and pear soup (recipe below), and the journey of preparing for an event supporting The House of Ruth, featuring the trailer for the pilot, Badland Wives.
My New Organic Cotton, Clothing Line
It wasn’t just soup I was preparing for the event. I had planned for several months to get my line of clothing ready in time for this day, so that some of my magical Sisters serving soup, could model my clothes.
Long story short, I wanted the fabric I had printed to be ready in time for this event, with 2 weeks for sewing, but it didn’t happen. I gave up hope that it would be ready for the event, until I got an email the night before.
I had a moment of upset and quarrel inside of me, wondering how I would get the fabric in Carson when I had to be at the Avalon in the morning. My mind was in a spin, just like it was when I was dealing with the details of ordering the fabric.
Finally, I called one of my Fairies and desperately asked her to pick up the fabric. And she did! I couldn’t believe the miracle!
All I needed to do was load my car with a bunch of heavy equipment, while my wrist was sore and in pain from the surgery, and bring my sewing machine, so I could make the clothes on the spot! I had to do it! I was determined to have the clothes ready on this day.
I arrived to happily find out that the Sorceress team had the balcony all to ourselves!
There I was at the Avalon, a big Hollywood event space, and I was experiencing the balcony the way I am at home. Sewing and cooking at the same time. It was like a funny dream.
I made Lana Fairy a skirt. Then, I accidentally had a thought that I should make her a shirt as well.
I let go of that thought. Soon after, I let her carry a bucket of blue butterfly pea pod tea and it spilled on her white tank top.
“My shirt has blue on it now.” She said.
“Oh, no I’m so sorry, this is my fault, because I wanted to make you a shirt.” As I grabbed my scissors to whip up a tank top.
My New Sorceress Crown
I have a collection of Sorceress hats. A couple weeks before the event, a Man (a fan) sent me 6 new hats! I had plenty for the girls to choose from, to wear that night.
Part of my Sorceress story began a few years ago with one black hat, then came the famous red hat. The red hat was cut up in front of my face into little pieces. It just so happened that I wore the red hat in my video to be premiered at the Avalon, so Pidge (the event Producer), wanted me to wear it that night. Naturally, we wanted a really amazing, upgraded red hat, so I got in touch with my favorite hat maker, Enrico of Busto and Sun.
Enrico specially made a red hat for me in Topanga. It was a truly uplifting moment after all I had been through, and my story about the red hat. It was a moment where if I had seen the future, when my red hat was being cut up in front of me, I would have felt as satisfied as I did when I put this hat on my head for the first time. It has an amethyst hanging from it. My favorite stone.
The Earth Angel meticulously set up the table like a Capricorn. And the beautiful glowing group of Women in hats were out and about the room serving magic tea.
It was butterfly pea pod tea, an organic tea that changes color when you add lemon juice to it.
When it came time to serve the soup, we all gathered to send the soup blessings and all who slurped it. The girls made good jokes during the blessing ceremony.
My video was a joke about dandelion greens. I always felt they were too bitter, but give me any vegetable and I’ll figure out a way to love it. Which is why dandelion greens were an integral component to the soup for this event.
The Adventurous Story of the Soup, and a Recipe
I let things happen the way they do and I take the inspiration from synchronicity. Even if the circumstance seems to be in cosmic madness, I still find messages from the Universe and let myself enjoy the ride of watching how the story unfolds, and what ingredients are symbolic to the journey of the next soup. That’s the fun of soup sorcery.
One day I looked at a pear in the kitchen while I was experimenting with flavors for cauliflower soup, and decided to give it a try. Usually I would do cauliflower and apple with turmeric or curry powder. A voice said to me, “try the pear instead, this time”, so I did. It was in season.
It wasn’t a mistake because this is how I started
calling myself by a different last name. I had been
looking for one for over a year.
The next thing I knew, I met a Woman at Erewhon, who wore a heart on her shirt. I was having so much fun with her, I told her I didn’t want to her leave, and she said, “yes you do.” And scurried off. As soon as she left, a Pegasus took her place holding the famous, crispy buffalo Cauliflower.
Soon after, I ended up with pears and more pears, a gift from him. I had pears after my surgery, pears with a few meals, pear tastings, pears everywhere! He told me a pear story that made me cry. Out of nowhere my Grandmother told me a story of how pears helped my Step Grandfathers asthma.
Pegasus and I flew into Erewhon one night, and saw some red pears. There was a name of the pear on the sticker, star krimsky. “How do people come up with these names for produce?”, we asked each other. He looked at the sticker and lit up with big bright eyes!
“Star krimsky, this should be your new name!!!” Pegasus said as he lit up with glee.
I thought he was being silly and childish, until I realized he was channeling something and he was right. “Star could be my last name, it’s exactly what I wanted it to be.” I designed star fabric, stars on my logo, and I have a car with stars on it. We agreed that adding the word krimsky would be too long. Thank Goddess for that.
Somewhere around this time I realized that I wanted to add truffle oil on top of the soup, and kuzu limes. The next thing I knew, we were eating some pears in Topanga, and the Pegasus saw some truffle salt! We gave it a try.
A few days later we had a caviar lime and truffle oil pear tasting with 3 types of pears. Guess what the winner was!?
The red pear!
I went to the office of the Papa of Erewhon and asked him if I could buy lots of red pears.
“Which one? The barlett red pear or the star krimsky red pear?” He said.
“Which one do you think tastes better?” I said.
“The star krimsky, is the best tasting pear of all!” He said.
Of course it was! It turns out it’s rare to get it too, and I love rare finds. There aren’t even any on the shelf right now. I had it just in time.
I walked out of the office, and there was the Pegasus right in front of me.
“I knew I would see you when I walked out of the office.” I said. I thought he would be several steps closer, but regardless he was just about in the spot I had thought he would be.
It’s true, I felt it as I walked towards the office, wondering if I would be right.
This was a nice transition because after I was divorced, I felt so uncomfortable saying an old last name. Some people thought I should call my self Kali Flower, but it sounded too hippie to me. I love to follow the stars towards the direction of my dreams.
So you see? Life happens. Even when there are moments of disappointments, down time, maybe even some boring moments, imperfect moments, or times of waiting, times of intense worry that I wouldn’t get the fabric in time, tears, pain in my wrist, people being deceitful, dark and light moments, moments I didn’t know what to say, moments I had been misunderstood, too silent, times I had to work harder at calming my nervous system, and so on. I’m compacting the story into the way it is intended to be, honored in its highest light. In the end, some of the fairies had skirts to wear, the soup was a bright and flavorful sip of flavors, the tea was magical, I found my name (at least for now), I have the greatest red hat ever made with a little gold star on the center of my crown, and the Sorceress team was as beautiful as can be. Everyone was in the right place at the right time. After all that, I achieved the soup I wanted.
May all being be blessed. May all beings feel happy. May all beings be safe and cared for.
Kaliflower & Pear Soup
1 Cauliflower, chopped
1 Pear (preferably star krimsky), sliced up
Half a small Onion, sliced
Broth or Water (I used dandelion in the broth)
Salt and Pepper to taste
And of course chopped dandelion greens! Chop them little, like you’re chopping parsley.
Details: Pour a thin layer of water on a baking sheet. Bake the Cauliflower, Pear, and onion in the oven at 350 degrees until it’s cooked through. Safely add more water if needed, throughout the cooking. Let it cool down and then blend the ingredients with some broth or water. Use as much as you want to your desired consistency, and add as much turmeric, lemongrass powder, salt, and pepper, to taste. Don’t use too much turmeric, it’ll be bitter.
You can warm the soup up or have it chilled. I just like to blend the ingredients while they’re cooled down so that I don’t pour hot soup into a plastic vitamix, essentially poisoning it a little. If you have a stainless steel or glass blender you don’t have to worry about that.
Drizzle truffle oil on top of the soup.
Squeeze some kuzu lime on top. (if there aren’t any available, use a lime)
Sprinkle edible flowers.
Top with thinly shaved fennel and a piece of dried fig.
Sprinkle with those healthy nutritious, incredible dandelion greens.
The pink flowers wilted on my altar. I left them dried in their vase for over a week. It wasn’t like me. I can happily replace them on my own. The air felt that morning. I tried to catch the exact words for the feelings I was intuitively picking up on. I didn’t know how to respond, and to make things stranger, I couldn’t figure out why I didn’t crave my favorite pickles anymore. It was so disappointing, I really love those pickles.
The Universe has a plan. I knew there would be no fresh flowers coming to replace them. It was time to pluck them off their protective sepals and lay them on top of all the other wilted and dry petals. I placed a Jasper wand on top of them. I brought out the ocarina “lady muse”. I tried to meditate as usual but I couldn’t. I knew what was going to happen so I grabbed at my paper and pen to write.
“A dried flower is as beautiful as when it’s fresh. Letting go feels as good as the embrace.” And that leads me to begin this story with….
INTRODUCING THE VIKING ANGEL
As much as I resisted, in the midst of doing big important things, with an event coming up, I escaped from my focus on my work for a moment. I spent time with a Viking Angel by an oak tree under the Aries Full Moon. He’s an Angel that reminds me of a Viking in an Angelic way. He stands up for people any chance he gets, and once saved a Woman’s life, who was being stabbed by her boyfriend. As it happens, the event I’m preparing for is a fundraiser for victims of domestic violence.
He told me I wouldn’t have to worry about abuse again. Kind words, and I felt so good tears rolled down my face, though that was a decision I already made when my red hat was cut up. With him, I could feel the air around me as crisp, clear and safe. He gave me flowers, and more flowers.
20 years ago I injured my wrist, and after all those years of looking for natural solutions, and doing crazy things I wouldn’t recommend, it was time to go for surgery.
“I’m going to get wrist surgery this Friday”, I told him. He wanted to help.
THE HOSPITAL ANGELS
The Viking Angel picked me up to go to the hospital. Once I was settled, and in the room with the nurse, he left to go do more angelic earth work.
The nurse was an angel of comfort. I complimented her about it.
“My son has anxiety, so I really know how to make people feel comfortable in a room,” she said as she moved one thing here and there. Her quality of movements were energetic, and had less to do with what needed to be moved around. It just felt right.
After I answered all her questions, and it was almost time to be rolled out on the Hospital bed, I told her I was scared and nervous about the anesthesia. I began to curl up in fear. She stopped me.
“Don’t go in there like that, or you’ll wake up not feeling good. Here look at this wallpaper, it’s Hawaii.”
Although, Hawaii sounded nice and maybe the kid like wallpaper could be helpful, I knew just what to do. So I texted the Earth Angel.
“Could you send me a picture of nature? I’m scared.”
Just in time, he got my message, and sent me a picture he took. I felt immediate peace.
“Time to put your phone in the bag. You’re going to talk to the Anesthesiologist and then we’re going to roll you into another room.”
On the way, there were other people rolling around in Hospital beds. “Good Driving!” The nurses would say to each other. I felt safe hearing positive words.
The Anesthesia room was cold, with big machines, and huge circle lights over my head. The Doctor was in the corner with a blanket covering herself. They gave me extra blankets which were fresh out of the dryer. Scary cold room, in other words.
A mask went over my face, as I awaited the “talk” with the anesthesiologist.
“It’s oxygen, you like oxygen right? breathe in and out.”
I questioned in my mind if this was really oxygen, then someone on my other side, began to stick a needle in me and told me to count to 10. At 7, they told me to count slower. My body was tingling, and all went black.
Waking Up in Unity Consciousness
The next thing I knew I was having a vivid dream with the Viking Angel. The dream was unusual, not very good, but somehow comforting at the same time. The dream faded into silence and I began to open my eyes and feel consciousness. My senses were unaware, yet very awakened to positive forces.
From across the room a Man said, “How are you feeling?” His back was turned from me.
“Good”, I said. I was being honest. I was happy to be waking up.
He asked a couple more questions, and I answered them so he could hear me. The sound of his voice had the reminiscence of what it would be like if he was right above me. I began to be aware of the possibility that maybe he wasn’t talking to me. The Woman next to me was sort of muted, and in her own world. I began to sense in the ethers that from a higher consciousness level, she wasn’t responding to me yet, because there was a part of everyone in the room for a few moments that was aware of unity consciousness, just because I was aware of it.
The way I answered the questions was so positive, I wondered if it was happening because it would help the other patient in some way.
Finally, I answered one more question and felt some energy hit me a little. The questions weren’t for me.
“He’s talking to his patient.” The nurse next to me said, as I started to gain consciousness to realize I was in a room with other patients.
The Empathic Nurse
The next thing I knew I was in another room with a magical nurse at a computer, who had long wavy hair. Immediately, I felt a connection with her. She was empathic, kind, positive, and well functional. She said some things that blew my mind and warmed my heart. I realized, I was in the right place at the right time. With all my fears about what I just put myself through, she was a pleasant reminder that I was where I was supposed to be.
The Viking Angel came in with a warm, bright, compassionate look on his face. Our interaction was so kind and sweet, that the Empathic Nurse, had to share with us how much she liked us. We all shared stories.
The Viking Angel walked out while the Empathic Nurse and I exchanged some girly comments. For a moment, as I was still figuring out what was going on, I said, “where did he go?”
“He just went to get the car.” Suddenly, I felt so incredibly safe and cared for. She then wheeled me out in a chair, to his car. “Stay positive”, she assured me.
The Viking Angel and I spent the next few hours together, with some piano playing, a wild and hilarious moment at the store, sharing pears, and some tears telling stories in the backyard. Then it was time for me to be on my own. I felt like, if that was the last time I saw him, it was fine, I was sent an Angel to help me through the scary hospital day.
The Flowers were still living.
THE WHOLE FOODS ANGEL
“Could you get Grandma some orchids today?” My Aunt texted.
We face-timed next to the orchids at Whole Foods, trying to decide which one to get. I didn’t realize I would end up with a large one and I didn’t have a cart. I wasn’t supposed to carry anything with my left hand. So I was holding an orchid, a spinach box, and a pear without causing too much a nuisance on my right hand. It was a little crazy.
I walked down the aisle wishing I had gotten a cart, “if only someone could give me a cart right now.” I felt like since I didn’t have someone with me, it would be so nice to feel that I’m being looked out for. My wrist was in no position to be doing what I was doing. Moments later, and I’m crying as I write this, you can guess what happened.
A humble man, came up behind me and rolled a cart over. “Here you go.”
I wasn’t aware yet of what was happening, so my timing of response was delayed.
“This is for you.” he said.
“Oh my God, thank you! I’m not supposed to carry anything with my right hand.”
“You’re welcome! I’m just buying soup!” He held up his big cup of soup in his hand. He didn’t need the cart. Soup was all he came there for. Or was he a spirit in human form who knew I was the Soup Sorceress?
“I needed that thank, thank you, I was just hoping.”
“There are Angels everywhere,” he said. Then he was off and I never saw him again. The way he walked away, felt like magic.
He was just buying soup with a big empty cart.
It was a moment I didn’t want to forget, as I got teary eyed that Angels were looking out for me.
MY LITTLE ANGEL MOMENT
Later that week, hand in pain; I walked outside the gate at a friends house, knowing I was walking out at just the right time for whatever reason. Across the street was an elderly Man carrying an insulated Trader Joes bag.
“Joe?!” I said.
“Yes, that’s me.”
“I used to Art Model for you a decade ago.”
“Oh you look familiar. I’m much older now.”
I looked at his bag.
“Can I carry that for you?”
I knew Joes house, you have to walk a long way down steps and ramps to get to his little cabin by the creek. He almost didn’t let me help him.
“Are you sure? I’m happy to help.”
“I’m 96 years old”, he said. Then he let me help him.
“Are you sure? It’s really heavy.” he said.
With my right hand in a cast, “I still have one hand I can use right now, I can do it.” And we took a nice walk to his cabin to drop off his bag.
The Last Tea with the Viking Angel
I finally plucked the dried flowers that morning.
We wanted to go to the annual Chili Cook Off, but when we arrived there was a sign showing it was postponed. We went to the Theatricum across the street, but they were busy and I couldn’t show him the big stage. We went to Mimosa Cafe and I pointed out the koi fish pond, but an animal had eaten all the the koi fish. It wasn’t the best time to have tea at Mimosa, it’s more fun in the morning. Amidst an important conversation, someone I knew walked towards us. I politely said hello. Not the best idea. He came back to ask us if we wanted to buy acid. I rolled my eyes inside, thinking, ” today just isn’t the best reflection of Topanga for the Viking Angel to see.” We politely declined his offer.
“Can I ask you guys a question?” He asked us, as he pulled up a chair.
“How long is this story? We’re right in the middle of a big conversation.” I said.
“It’s really quick. It’s really important. Why do girls like fat guys?” As he curled up his lips in anger. My body went tense. It was a terrible feeling, I didn’t like his language towards people one bit and the deep emotions running through him felt uncomfortable. I wanted to say, “because he treats her better than you do,” but I saved myself for better words and let the Viking Angel kindly send him away.
Release & Transform
I didn’t want to pick up a little card in the bowl on the counter at Mimosa, full of different words for you to look away and choose one to gain insight for the day. I stirred the cards and chose transformation. I was thinking, “oh god, really, again?” As a Scorpio, you get used to it over and over and over again. It’s a truly fantastic journey, but it’s frustrating too. I knew it was coming when I broke a rose quartz wand, and accidentally poked an eyeball with my hat.
After many words and long moments of silence, that was the day to let go of the Viking Angel and jump into my next portal of transformation the way a pheonixing Scorpio does. I am evolving my divine feminine more every day, and I love that.
His soul is transforming to be the Man he’s meant to be. That’s why I had released his flower petals that morning. It’s time for him to travel to his next adventure of manly Angel Viking missions, so many miles away from here.
I’ll be there in spirit, sending the scary spiders outside and clearing away cobwebs for you.
He often said, “I’ll always protect you.” And this song was playing, here with me, that night, when he last messaged me. “goodnight, young beautiful sorceress.” There are many spirits protecting us, and those words he spoke, are a reflection of all those spirits, spoken by a human smiley face.
Goodbye young Viking Angel.
I’ll always remember that stool we both felt compelled to move at Erewhon, so it wouldn’t bother anyone else.
May all beings feel the magic in the air. May all beings be loved. My all beings feel safe to be themselves. May all beings transform. May all beings live in their truth and soul purpose. May all beings find magic in every day. May all beings have peace. May all beings be free.
No soup recipe this time, it’s coming. I have a new broth batch at Erewhon in Calabasas, good for our immune system and intuition, something I was challenged with this last month.
In my silent quest to find better words in all situations, I dissolved this.
In this post you’ll learn the benefit of the herbs I was guided to put together for my rose soup, and a story about the sacred journey of how this healing soup emerged. I hope it will inspire your own journey of gathering ingredients for a rose soup this Spring. It was a powerful experience. Below I share a link to a video where I explain a little more about that. As someone who is energetically sensitive and has struggled with how to manage it, this rose soup journey has been one of many steps forward.
Rose and Nettles soup for Mothers Day. Grounding and revitalizing feminine strength.
“Do you want to harvest roses with us?” Marysia our green witch guide said, as I was on my way out . Little did I know that when I innocently agreed, I was about to enter my next cosmic journey. I’m still writing about my last “midnight awakening journey.” I’ll share about it soon.
I was almost ready to leave the farm for the day, but I loved the idea of gathering a few roses. I didn’t even realize I was coming to the farm until the night before, when I was perplexed with a decision. I’ll backtrack into that a moment, it’s a good little part of the story and saved my life.
The decision I made was about my wheel on my Subaru. It was cracked, and I didn’t know. Multiple little events in divine timing led me to my mechanic for an oil change, who noticed it and told me. “If you’re not gonna get the wheel today you need to at least rotate the wheels so that that wheel is in the back of the car. In case it breaks, it’ll be safer in the back than in the front.” That led me to Hanks Tires to rotate them.
At Hanks, a man named Sean said, “I’m not letting you leave here with that tire on. We’re not rotating them. We’re putting the spare on. You have to get a new wheel.”
They gave me no choice.
“If I rotate those tires and then let you go, I’ll go home feeling horrible thinking, I let that girl leave like that.” He went on to express just how dangerous a cracked tire is.
“You must’ve hit a pothole.”
“Ya I must’ve”, as I stood there silently, picturing the memory in my head of bumping up the side of the curve at Erewhon Market a couple months ago, thinking,“oh I must’ve did some damage” and then I moved on. These guys saved my life.
He sent me to get a wheel at the wheel store. It was 20 minutes before closing. I was faced with the decision to keep the spare on for the next 5 days and wait for a Subaru wheel to be shipped, or get the other brand that costs a little less, is the same size, and doesn’t match the rest of the wheels on the car. While trying to make the decision, Alison from Plumcot farm called to invite me to the farm the next morning. My defining decision to drive around with a non matching wheel came down to that. I can’t drive to Malibu on a spare tire, and I don’t want to stop the flow of what’s happening here, so I got the non matching wheel. Feeling a little strange, I took off.
Had I not done that, I wouldn’t have ended up high on roses and making this magic healing soup, that’s in alignment with what I need right now. I remember around the time that I started to make decisions like that, and how that changed my life. If I had cared more about the social advantage of having matching wheels, I wouldn’t have ended up sniffing roses for an hour and healing a part of myself that has been asking to be healed. The cosmos came in at the right timing when Alison called, which helped me make my decision.
Back to the rose story.
We walked to the roses, sat down, and Marysia began to explain that before we harvest, we would connect to the roses. .
With her gentle guidance and our willingness to dive in, the roses pulled our faces into them, we were lost in the rose spirit for many minutes. The scent was so strong. Each of us connecting to a different bush, a different color. The scent pulled me in so deeply, my whole body fell into it’s vortex. I breathed deeply. I felt connected to it and I kept feeling. We all stopped at the same time and shared what was on our mind.
She gave us some leaves of a plant, so that we could give back a gift to the roses after we harvested. We spent an hour, making love to roses, laughing, and harvesting them. To harvest them, we gently pulled the petals off. Then we snipped the stem off in a slant, close to a leaf stem.
Each color bush had its own name which intensified the experience.
Heart of Innocence
Heaven on Earth
Wild Blue Yonder (this is what I used for soup)
At a certain point we realized we all felt like we were on a psychedelic, or more like we expressed why we didn’t need psychedelics because it’s so easy for us to access those states. We were in another dimension. It was a little like going to “Alice in Wonderland.” on Plumcot Farm.
Imagine if every billboard that was promoting a cannabis company was actually promoting a new small, biodynamic farm, with beautiful pictures of colorful produce and flowers. If growing more small farms, was as popular, profitable, and as well promoted as CBD, the world would totally change. I’ll explain more about that in my next post. 🙂
I decided to make a rose and nettle soup. I asked Marysia her thoughts. She runs “The Gaia School of Healing California.” (I highly recommend her course.)
She also has a little shop in Topanga, called “Wild Love Apothecary”, where you can pick up dried herbs and talk to green witch specialists.
I’m still a young Sorceress and I have much to learn about this adventure that I’ve been guided into over the years. Marysia taught me some things about the plants that I wanted to make a soup with, as I pondered which ingredients I wanted to put together.
The Benefits of Roses, Nettles, and Burdock
“What do you think about the healing combination of rose and nettles?”, I said.
“That’s great together, yes. Nettles helps us receive the deep nourishment and wild vitality of the earth mother. Roses opens are heart and unconditional and divine love.”
She also suggested I use burdock. I wasn’t surprised this came up. Burdock has a symbolic meaning for me in healing relationship with Men. When she said that, I knew it was time for me to invite burdock into the soup, especially with Mothers Day coming up, it was the right timing.
This is like the next chapter after I had done the liver cleanse, which I also called the lovers cleanse. I’ll get more into that when I bring up my soup journey event, “Soup Revitalize” as opposed to a “Soup Cleanse”.
“Burdock is a nourishing root, high in minerals, enzymes, and vitamins. It cleanses the lymph, it’s grounding and nourishing.”
I’m in constant reflection with grounding and calming my nervous system. I’ve come a long way with it and I loved the idea of using burdock to help.
Wild Love Apothecary Shop
I asked the Earth Angel to pick up burdock for me in our little town magic shop.
When he was there a fellow Topangan asked him, “what are you getting?”
“I’m getting some burdock for a friend.” said the Earth Angel
“Oh, sounds like a Kali order.”
That’s right. 🙂
I think you can agree from the photo, this rose soup really transformed into a real deal green witch soup. There’s so much I’m not in control of, I’m just watching it happen.
Here’s the soup, if you would like to try something like it.
May all beings stop to smell the roses. May all beings experience realms of time and space that nourish, revitalize, and inspire us. May all beings have access to the world’s best plant medicines.
You can also click here to see what I did in a short video, and I explain how these herbs helped me.
~First, I made an overnight infusion with mullen, geranium, sage, and burdock. To make an overnight infusion, I just poured hot water into the mason jar with the herbs in it and left it out all night. Not in the fridge. This would be the broth.
~In the morning, I discarded the herbs and pureed the liquid and the burdock, with the fresh rose, nettle leaves, purple snap pea flowers, chocolate mint, and lemon balm.
~I simmered that with scallions, basil and zucchini, and then used a stainless steel hand mixer to blend the ingredients. Then I added seaweed, salt, and other spices.
~The salad you see on top of the soup is how I like to add toppings, raw kohlrabi and watermelon radish with olive oil. I also added spicy pickled snap peas. Give your soup a fresh crunch! If I had a soup shop I would have various ingredients you could put on top like you do for ice cream, accept you would be eating medicine instead of sugar and have fun with it. 🙂
Happy Mothers Day
Lastly, I want to say Happy Mothers Day, and share how blessed I feel to have such an incredible, creative, polite, intelligent, teenage Son who continues to impress everyone around him.
Recently I came to a realization: that I had chased a big white rabbit, fell into its hole for many years, and was pulled out by a caterpillar.
When I shared this with my astrologer friend Alex, she said, “I know, I watched it happen.” And my thought was, “I know, I watched you watch it happen and I had a real enjoyment knowing you could see!” She wasn’t there from the beginning, but she caught on when she did, and popped in and out in such delightful timing. One time, she popped in while I was hiking. “Kali!?” I was overjoyed! It’s easy to spot a red hat in the forest.
I showed her the direction where the secret spot for a lot of pearly everlasting exists. Turns out, it was both our favorite flower, and she’d been dying to know the name of it. I said, “it smells like heaven orange”, she said, “it’s definitely waffles and maple syrup”. We’re both right!
I have journeyed like a lost Alice, pain in my heart and soul, ready to heal. And yes, I was chased by cards with swords (It’s complicated to explain who had the cards and who had the swords- but they were there).
Coincidentally (or not) I played Alice in a play when I was 9. It was a great role for me, but I so wanted to be one of the Orphans. The Orphans were a room full of my Acting class friends, and playing Alice felt pretty lonely. I only got to dialogue with, grown up Actors, Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum. Not getting to be one of the Orphans with all my friends, who intuitively shared dreams together in the night, felt a little like I do now; a lonely Alice. The play was called Orphan Dreams, Directed by Elisabeth Brooks, and I was Alice in Wonderland in one of the dreams.
When I was 20, I was in the movie The Helix, which was a spoof of The Matrix. You can see it on YouTube, starring Vanilla Ice. I played a prostitute, and my soon-to-be-first-husband played The Rabbit, in a rabbit suit, in one of the scenes. A lot happened behind the scenes of the film. It was pretty hilarious. I won’t get into the story about the Hulk, or what we did with the Rabbit head in Venice Beach. Just know that I followed that bouncy Rabbit down the rabbit hole.
My friend Corey and I ran into Laurence Fishburne in Venice during the making of the film, and told him about that Matrix spoof. He was very nice about it, and told us to be careful crossing the street. We were.
Then there was this music video I did when I was 19, which reminded me of a life experience years later. It was so strange to uncover this video, and realize how similar the video was to a future experience. As a method actress, I guess I was drawing on future experience rather than past experience, as one would expect. But time is relative anyway, so I guess that makes sense.
Luckily for me, not all of the films or plays I did had immediate relevance to my life away from the stage or camera; otherwise I’d be dead at 15, survived tackling a vampire, I’d be Helen Keller, a prostitute in downtown, and a lesbian talking to an imaginary girlfriend in a pink and white striped sweater. And I’d have been caught sucking on a frozen popsicle on the Playboy channel (Oops! Actually, that was a reality show and that did happen).
Just a day after writing this, I was in the parking lot of Mimosa Cafe when I looked at the car parked next to me and saw a pink and white striped fabric. I thought, oh that kinda looks like that sweater I was talking about. Wait, that’s pretty much exactly like the fabric of the sweater I was talking about.
What I want to know is what this random chicken egg was doing in the forest, why it was still there yesterday, and why I’m craving chicken when I stopped eating meat? I was told a story this morning about a girl named Love Chicken. And why last night I was intuitively guided to notice an egg in one of my Uncle’s paintings. And then, sadly, I saw a road kill chicken on the freeway today. It had quite beautiful feathers. This may be why people think I’m high all the time, but the reality is I don’t use weed, hallucinogens, alcohol, nothing. I can’t even eat chocolate without shaking!
There was a time when I used to think shrooms should be micro-dosed daily. I didn’t do the experiment, I just thought people would like it better than coffee. That was before I was pregnant with my Son, and began waking up in incredible trance states of awareness that were totally natural to me. I was young and enthused by the discovery of the magic mushrooms. The things I saw, the things I did… it was all pretty interesting.
Have you ever been sucked up a portal? There’s nothing like that sound and the way people look, when you’re watching them from above and inside a portal. It’s like a tube mirror (while feeling the sucking feeling of the tube) that distorts their face, a little like they’re the one in the portal getting their face sucked in the air. This is not an easy experience to explain; I’ve really tried.
Through my own experience, I believe that we can achieve great states of consciousness without the help of the more intense plant medicines. I especially felt that way when I was pregnant, waking up in wild, hyperactive states of consciousness.
Like that time I did a liver flush and I went from feeling low and not so good, pretty weak, and, as you can see in the middle of the video, I go into a trance where I talk about purple stars, and at the end of the video I look pretty lit up. This was over about a 2-week period of time. 8 days for the flush. My Brother said, “maybe you’re cleansing the ‘shrooms from your liver.” It definitely felt like it.
I’m already so sensitive to everything and everyone, that I can really feel it if they are taking anything. If people are drunk, I feel it, and in some cases, even have fun without the painful effects on my body.
And all I can say now is, there was a time I left behind some shoes as a symbolic representation, actually two times now, once with the caterpillar, once with the Rabbit, and today I have new shoes. The best, most comfy ones so far. I think that about sums up years of pain, struggle, and heartbreak. More will be revealed.
May all beings be free of pain. May all beings be well fed. May all beings climb out of the pain of loneliness. May all beings find safety. May all beings be blessed, especially my son’s cat! That miracle cat might be the next story.